I got the opportunity to speak to one of the greatest TV moms that ever graced the small screen when I chatted up “Family Ties” star Meredith Baxter. We covered everything from her time on the beloved sitcom to her coming out, and she answered each question with a modicum of dignity, humor and honesty, truly one of my favorite interviews. Check it out at: http://www.edgeboston.com/index.php?ch=entertainment&sc=celebrities&sc2=features&sc3=&id=122086 , sha la la la!
Melissa Etheridge: Happiness Is An Option
By Tim Parks
When Melissa Etheridge takes to the Heineken Grandstand Stage at The San Diego County Fair on Saturday, July 18 at 7:30 pm, she will be kicking off her “Fearless Love” 2011 Tour, which has the rock ’n roll veteran playing to audiences across this great land of ours throughout the summer and beyond.
Etheridge not only brings her brand of being out and proud to the sold out show at the Fair, she also unleashes a catalog of hard rockin’ tunes to the fold. Songs such as her Grammy-winning efforts “Come To My Window” and “Ain’t It Heavy,” her Oscar-winning single from An Inconvenient Truth , “I Need To Wake Up,” and surefire crowd pleasers in the guises of “I’m The Only One,” “I Want To Come Over,” “Angels Would Fall,” and “Somebody Bring Me Some Water.”
With her bold declaration, via her 1993 album title of Yes I am, Etheridge became synonymous with being the consummate out performer, whose coming out did not slow down her career one iota. Her personal life held as much fascination for the public. During her partnership with Julie Cypher, the couple welcomed two children, Bailey in 1997 and Beckett in 1998, with sperm donor David Crosby. However, when Cypher began to waiver about her sexuality, the two split in 2000, and then Etheridge married actress Tammy Lynn Michaels in 2003.
With her wife by her side, Etheridge underwent chemotherapy for the breast cancer diagnosis she received in 2004, which she valiantly fought and beat under the watchful eye of the media and public, giving a brave performance, sans hair, at the 2005 Grammy Awards telecast.
In 2006, Michaels gave birth to a double blessing with twins Johnnie Rose and Miller Steven, and all seemed to be going well for the ladies, until they announced their split in April of last year. Since then, Michaels has taken to her blog and Twitter to vent her frustrations about the breakup, and with Etheridge’s new relationship with Nurse Jackie co-creator Linda Wallem.
As the date draws nearer for her time to go out on the road to entertain the masses, Etheridge kindly took time out of her busy schedule to talk with LGBT Weekly about performing live, family life and her split from Michaels, and how happiness is an option for the singer these days.
And, as would be expected of someone who lives her life as an open book, the singer was very candid in answering the questions presented to her.
LGBT Weekly: Which of your songs holds the most resonance for you to perform live?
Melissa Etheridge: Oh, that’s like asking me who my favorite child is (laughs). You see, I write every single one of ’em to hold resonance; that’s like one of my standards, it has to ring truthful or I don’t even want to sing it at all.
And there’s things that I don’t resonate with anymore that aren’t part of my life. “Somebody Bring Me Some Water,” I’m not there, yet, I can play that song and can feel myself in the vibration, and remember and have fun with it, and then walk out of it. It’s like acting in a great part for a play.
LGBT: What is the one thing that you love the most about touring, and the one thing you would do without about the experience?
ME: The performances, I love the shows, I love the different people in the audience and how excited they are to be there; that first moment of the 2 ½ hours of being on stage, that’s what it’s about. What I dislike is traveling and getting there (laughs), the other hours, being away from my family.
Can’t I have a theater in the yard and they can all come see me?
LGBT: If you could duet with anyone of the quote unquote younger female singers, who would it be and why?
ME: It’s funny because I am actually thinking of dueting. You know I love that Adele! God, let me sing with that girl. You can tell these English gals, people coming out of the U.K. are just, they’ve been listening to the rhythm and blues music, they’ve been listening to Aretha Franklin, you know that they’re hearing that music and they’re coming back with this great stuff. I just love hearing her sing.
LGBT: And, if you were to do an album of covers, who would be included on that?
ME: I would do covers on Springsteen and cover, well, mostly I relate to songs. I did some solo touring in 2009, and I did a different cover song for every show, and some of them were better than others. I did Radio head’s “Creep,” and loved, loved that! I loved doing Bette Midler’s “Stay With Me,” there’s just songs, rather than artists that I would do on an album.
LGBT: How do your children deal with having a famous mother?
ME: Man, they just don’t understand what the world sees in me. They’re like, “Mommy, when you’re up on stage, you make people laugh, and you’re not that funny.” Yeah, I know, to them I’m not.
I raised them from the very beginning to understand what I do, this is what I do I sing and a lot of people like to listen. Because even when they were two, three years old, strangers would come up to me in the grocery store, and the kids would say something like, “Do you know that person?” And, I’d have to explain to them that people know me, but I don’t know them, it’s how they know me because of the music.
And so they were very used to it and aware. They have come to see my shows and people go crazy and they’re like, “What are these people doing?” And then they, my older ones, have gotten into the teenage years, media is so much a part of it, and they realize that famous people are characters and the stuff they see, my place in it, they start to understand, they start to get this is what I’ve chosen to do.
It’s fascinating, because they don’t have a dream of being famous because they see how much work it is, and see what it really is. They like the art and the music, but the fame part is just crazy!
LGBT: You and Tammy had a very public split in realm of social media, how are you doing since the breakup?
ME: Well, I’m doing fine. It’s not pretty, and I don’t know if it ever will be. I would certainly hope that we could see eye-to-eye for the kids sake, you know? It’s just, it’s not pretty now, and that’s the nature, I guess, with relationships.
It’s quite icky, that’s a nice word, quite icky, it’s almost more so embarrassing. I’m embarrassed, it’s almost like, “Oh, come on.” It’s so Perez Hilton and it’s a low blow! So, I choose to, because this is my private life, and I’m not going to do that. I’m not going to retaliate, because that’s just like flypaper, and the next thing you know you’re like, “Help Me!” (She broke into an impression of David Hedison from the 1958 movie The Fly).
LGBT: And how are things going in your love life today?
ME: I’ve gotten to the point where it’s almost like I’m never going to talk about it again. But, sufficed to say, I am very, very happy. Because I deserve happiness, and that is my goal everyday, and when that’s your intention and your goal and that’s what you look for, then that’s what comes to you. So, I tell you I am happy.
LGBT: What has been the biggest change you have seen in yourself in the entirety of your career?
ME: Choosing happiness. My intention in the beginning and the price I thought I had to pay for success, or what I considered to be success, and then realizing that, oh no, success is was I happy today?
Then that’s successful, whether it’s the things that make me happy, from being with the kids, to a song, to the audience, writing, those things make me happy.
Stevie Nicks Stands And Looks Back
By Tim Parks
There are certain words that you associate when you hear the name Stevie Nicks, which are as indelible as the uniqueness inherent in her intonations during a song that surrounds you from your speakers. Words such as “royalty,” “survivor” and “one-of-a-kind,” and you can now officially place “Gleek” and “bossy” on the short list of adjectives to describe this artist.
The 63-year-old legend began her illustrious career with Fleetwood Mac in 1974, with her then-boyfriend Lindsey Buckingham, and the inclusion of the duo to the fray of Mick Fleetwood, Christine McVie, and John McVie, shot the girl from Phoenix, Arizona into the atmosphere of becoming a rock goddess.
The very next year, the group’s self-titled album would became the calling card that there was a new force to be reckoned with, as the change in lineup of the almost decade-old band heralded a new dawn of having hit singles, which included “Rhiannon,” “Over My Head,” and “Say You Love Me.” The song “Landslide” was also featured on this chart topper, but would not become an actual hit until 20 years later on the group’s live effort, The Dance.
The release of the group’s seminal effort, Rumours, became the gold standard for which teenagers and adults alike, of the day were deemed cool if they owned a copy of it on vinyl or 8-track tape in 1977.
The ninth highest selling album of all-time stayed in the #1 position on The U.S. charts for a staggering 31 weeks. The Nicks-written single, “Dreams,” became the only time the band would reach the top of the charts with a song, although the album also spawned the hits “Don’t Stop,” “You Make Loving Fun” and “Go Your Own Way.”
Speaking of going your own way, Nicks embarked on a successful solo career with the 1981 release of Bella Donna that produced the hits “Stop Draggin’ My Heart Around,” “Leather and Lace” and “Edge of Seventeen.” She returned to Fleetwood Mac for the 1982 release of Mirage and then prepped her second solo effort, Wild Heart, which was bolstered by the single “Stand Back.”
Professionally, Nicks was circling the globe on tour, but personally, she had split from Buckingham prior to the writing of Rumours, was experiencing infighting within the group, and was told by a plastic surgeon in 1986 that she needed to stop using cocaine, or it would severely affect her health. She was then put on the tranquilizer Klonopin to avoid a relapse on the drug that had fueled much of her time in the limelight, which proved to also be problematic, until she detoxed from it in 1994.
During those years and beyond, Nicks vacillated between projects with Fleetwood Mac and solo efforts, until there was a marked silence that was deafening for fans wanting new material, when there was a ten-year gap between her last singular CD Trouble in Shangri-La and her recent release In Your Dreams.
Her new disc is a throwback to her days as a “Gold Dust Woman,” as it evokes a sense that it is an unreleased Fleetwood Mac endeavor, and there is a reason for that. Her first single off In Your Dreams, “Secret Love” was originally written for the Rumours album, and her newest arsenal in her solo cannon has been heaped with praise as her best non-Fleetwood Mac recording to date.
Nicks spoke with LGBT Weekly about the her gay fan base, the resurgence of Fleetwood Mac songs used on Glee this past season, her favorite song, and why she’s a survivor.
Realizing She Had A Gay Fan Base
“I have a lot of gay friends, so that’s one side of it. The other side is ‘The Night of 1,000 Stevies.’ I don’t remember it was so long ago, but somebody said, ‘Do you know? There’s a major party that goes on every year in New York that’s called ‘Night of 1,000 Stevies?’ And I’m going, ‘What is that?’ And so they explained it to me, thinking that was pretty damn cool, and that was 20 years ago.
So, that really was the beginning of me really realizing that my music was really appealing to all my gay fans. And my goodness, this party has become historical, I think, and that was really the beginning. And who knew? When I was first told about it, I thought it would be a great thing that would happen maybe twice, and then it was still going on and I’m thrilled.”
Shouting Out With Glee
“First of all, I’ve been watching Glee since the beginning, and like we all do, we have our favorite TV shows that we totally look forward to.So when I found out that they were doing ‘Landslide,’ and that Gwyneth (Paltrow) was going to come in and play her Holly Holiday character, and that Santana (Naya Rivera) and Brittany (Heather Morris) were going to sing it with her, I was just so knocked out! And I said, ‘Well, can I go?’ I’m in L.A., and so I went and hung out there for six or seven hours.
I was, first of all, so thrilled to be there and got to hang out with the cast, who I can hardly call by name; they have so become the characters. The greatest thing was that when it was over, they were grouped around me and Lea Michele, Rachel, said, ‘You know what? Nobody has ever done this. How many great songs from the ’80s, ’70s and ’60s have we done, and none of those artists have ever called us, or come down or sent us some roses or anything, taken any kind of notice whatsoever?’ And, I thought that was so sad.
So, of course I sent them huge flowers and then when they did the Rumours thing, which was quite a favor they did for me when they put that out the same day my record came out; I thought that was so lovely of them, so I sent more flowers to my Glee children. A day without Glee is like a day without sunshine.”
Choosing A Favorite Song In Her Catalog
“Oh, that’s hard, because I have different favorites at different times in my life. That doesn’t necessarily mean that you put out an album and one of the songs on that album is now your favorite song, it doesn’t mean that at all. It’s just whatever’s happening to you in your life kind of tends to move you towards what might be your favorite song to sing on stage.
Right now, for me, my favorite song is ‘Moonlight (A Vampire’s Dream),’ but part of that song was written in the mid-Seventies. So, that’s part of an ancient song that travels down through time between Lindsey and Stevie and Edward and Bella (from Twilight). So, for right now, that’s my favorite.”
The Rigors of Touring
“I get up in the morning and I ask myself, ‘Do I have to pull up those black tights one more time?’ As tired as I get sometimes, I say to myself, ‘How long would you be happy laying around your house watching TV? I’ve had now this extended three month vacation, and now I’m totally bored!’
So I really appreciate that I lead a very, very quote romantic life as a writer and singer and songwriter and a girl who gets to travel the world. The traveling part of it is really pretty great; I think that we as artists get more rest when we’re out on the road than we do when we’re home. Because when you’re out on the road, you’re on a schedule.”
Penning Her Memoirs
“I think if I were to do that, which I’ve considered, I would never write your creepy tell-all book. I would write a vignette book where one chapter would be ‘Peace Sunday,’ and I would tell you what happened on that day. And one chapter would be ‘The Day I Met Lindsey,’ another chapter would be ‘The Day That I Got My Record Deal,’ when I got signed to Atlantic Records for Bella Donna.
It’s those kinds of things that, when I look back on them, are so exciting and there’s pages and pages and pages to be written about each one of those things. That’s what my book would be, and I would have art, a lot of poetry in it, I would have self portraits that I’ve taken. It would be a real trippy adventure book through my life. If I did talk about the bad stuff, I’d talk about it in a very philosophical way, as to help people, instead of scaring people.”
The Nature of Survival
“I think I attribute my strength to not and never having been a quitter. I do not walk away in the face of adversity, I never have. I also don’t listen to people who don’t think I’m right about my music, or really, I don’t listen to people about anything! My mom said to me, when I was in the 5th grade, ‘Well, I hope you get a job where you’re the boss, because you don’t really like anyone to tell you what to do.’
And I took what she said very much to heart, and that’s why I said that I’d be a lead singer. When I went into Fleetwood Mac, Christine and I, we realized that since there was two of us that we really were a force of nature and that we were never going to be treated like second class citizens in the rock ‘n roll world. So, if we walked into the room, we were going to be just as respected as Eric Clapton or any of those guys, and we were never going to let anyone treat us any less. And we didn’t, in the beginning we really had to make a statement.
And it works, if you walk into a room with that kind of attitude, a good attitude but a strong attitude, of sort of a don’t mess with me attitude, you can get so far. If you leave and bow your head one little bit, and people see it, then you’re toast.”
Lisa Lampanelli: That’s Mrs. Queen of Mean To You!
By Tim Parks
You know immediately that you are on the phone with Lisa Lampanelli, she greets you with “How are you? You big dirty homo!” When asked how she knew I was gay the reply is, “Oh my God, honey. The phone just lisped at me.”
It is comments like that, and her no-holds-barred approach to comedy, which have endeared her to us in the opposite of a moth to a flame scenario. It’s more like flamers to a queen bee, as she told me about her gay curb appeal.
“I think it’s because I’ve always felt like kind of an outsider, and so, the gays identify with me; they sense that I didn’t always fit in. Also, I think it’s because gay guys have really low self-esteem and like to be made fun of, and I remind them of their mother.”
Well, only if our mothers are being played by Faye Dunaway in Mommie Dearest, ok?
Speaking of roles, Lampanelli recently took on the moniker of Mrs., when she tied the knot on with Jimmy “Big Balls” Cannizzaro. Appropriately, the Comedy Central Roast fixture was wed at The Friar’s Club in New York City, famous for its risqué celeb skewerings.
However, Lampanelli didn’t roast anyone during her vows.
“It was a normal, classic New York wedding,” she said. “Comics always feel like they have to wear the keyboard tie and the tuxedo t-shirt and the rainbow suspenders and do a roast. It makes a mockery of the whole thing, because this is going to be my last marriage this year.”
And how does it feel to be Mrs. “Big Balls?”
“It feels very good to be able to do something that you faggots can’t,” she joked. “For so many years, you’ve criticized our outfits and our hairstyles; well screw you, you dirty homos, I got married and you can’t.”
Something we can do is wonder if the former “chocoholic” dater is suffering from chocolate withdrawals, seeing as Cannizzaro is Caucasian.
“Uh, no,” she stated. “Because first of all, Jimmy ‘Big Balls’ is sitting right next to me.”
The unflappable Lampanelli seemed flustered, but quickly bounced back when asked about her upcoming tour.
“I’ve been working on the material for it, and honestly, you’re real life always creeps into your comedy,” Lampanelli responded. “A lot of it’s about the relationship, it’s about the nut sack, and it’s about general things that annoy me. And, of course, my signature insults of everyone – including your people that are not going to Heaven, because God hates you.”
Lampanelli said she shies away from topics, if she can’t make the subject matter have “a funny twist to it.”
This seems impossible, especially when her services are rendered for the aforementioned Roasts. She did have a target in mind, if she had her pick of whom to kabob.
“Probably that big-headed dykeosaurus Rosie O’Donnell,” she quipped. “Because she takes herself a little too seriously, and she’s kinda beggin’ for it.”
Lampanelli was absent during last year’s flambé of Joan Rivers, because she wasn’t offered the Roast Master position and “it wasn’t worth my while” to interrupt her “Summer of Balls.”
“I had just met ‘Big Balls,’” she explained. “And you know how you get all in love and don’t want to do anything else, except hang out and stare at each other?”
Something else Lampanelli likes to stare at is television, in particular, The Real Housewives franchise.
She named New York’s Bethenny Frankel as her favorite, and met Danielle Staub during her woman-on-the-street segment on Extra saying, “from the neck down, she’s a f***ing 10.” But it’s another Jersey girl that she “skeeves.”
“I hate, with some passion you can’t even describe, Teresa (Giudice) that table flipping c**t. Because she’s in huge denial that she’s bankrupt; she thinks her house isn’t in foreclosure, and it totally is! By the way, do you notice that I get almost angry and these people aren’t in my life?”
While Lampanelli has found her niche as an insult comic, she is often referred to as “the lovable Queen of Mean,” which makes for a strange dichotomy. But, gasp, there are things that make her cry.
“I have a very soft heart and I cry at many things,” she admitted. “I have a couple of songs that instantly make me cry. The song ‘Somewhere Out There’ makes me weep instantly. And I also enjoy crying to ‘Hello’ by Neil Diamond.”
Janet Jackson: Up Close and Personal
By Tim Parks
For someone who has been in the public spotlight all of her life as part of the famous Jackson family, and herself, an entertainment industry vet since the ripe old age of ten; Janet Jackson is the one to shine said illumination away from her myriad of accomplishments.
There’s no diva attitude, there’s no false pretenses, just a not-so-surprisingly sweet woman behind the all of the number one singles, albums, tours and the different people she has embodied onscreen, be it small or large.
She first rose to TV fame on Good Times as Penny Woods, followed by stints on Diff’rent Strokes and Fame. Her silver screen resume began with a dramatic turn in 1993’s Poetic Justice, and recently Jackson has been writer/director Tyler Perry’s go to actress in projects such as, Why Did I Get Married?, it’s sequel, and delivered a powerful performance in For Colored Girls.
Since 1986, the singer has racked up an impressive roster of hits songs including: “Control,” “Miss You Much,” “That’s The Way Love Goes,” “All For You,” “So Excited” and “Feedback” – to literally name just a few.
She has also tackled subject matter on her albums from dance-oriented jams, socially conscious endeavors, and the many different facets of the term “sexuality.” Her “Rhythm Nation World Tour,” circa 1990, still holds the distinction of being the most successful debut concert tour by any recording artist.
Speaking of tours, the six-time Grammy-winner is currently in the middle of her “Number Ones, Up Close and Personal Tour,” on which she will perform her catalog of chart toppers and will give her fans (who selected certain cities for Jackson to perform in) a chance to see this iconic performer in more intimate settings. It will also be a celebration of recognizing a younger generation making their own impact, by being one of her “20 under 20.”
Jackson will meet and honor those who were nominated for their individual accomplishments within their respective communities in 20 cities during her tour, which isn’t surprising as she has always been an advocate for change, which has endeared her to the GLBT community. This was clearly evident recently with her PSA for The Trevor Project’s “It Gets Better” anti-bullying campaign.
Yet, during the midst of her busy performing schedule, she took time out to chat with me, via e-mail, about her career, the new book True You that she co-authored about struggling with self-esteem, body image and relationships. Personally, the chance to have her answer my series of “hard hitting questions” was akin to a dream come true, and my skin is still bruised from pinching myself. Ok, back to Janet… The most surprising answer was about how she feels about the word “icon” being applied to herself.
Here’s a hint: No, her first name ain’t baby, its Janet… Ms. Jackson if you’re …humble.
How does it feel to have your music inspire so many people throughout the years?
I am so happy to hear that my music has inspired people; I really am.
When I go into the studio to record music, I am inspired by whatever is going on in my life at the time, and I hope that people can relate to it.
If you had to pick just one song out of your extensive catalog as a personal favorite – which would it be and why?
I couldn’t do that. They are all special to me for different reasons. They each have memories that come to me when I am singing them.
I like the concept of more intimate-type settings for some of the stops on the “Number Ones, Up Close and Personal Tour” – how did the idea for that and having fans select certain cities for the tour come about?
When I was in Europe, there were some fans that were camping out in front of the hotel that I was at. Everytime that I came out, they would ask me when I would be performing in their city.
That gave me the idea to ask the fans to help me select the cities that I would bring ‘Number Ones, Up Close and Personal’ to. The response has been incredible!
Then I came back to the States to perform a private date inNew York at Radio City Music Hall.
It was so much fun. I could see everyone’s faces, and all I could think about was that this was how I wanted to do my next tour. All the venues that I will perform at during this tour will be up close and personal. I am looking forward to seeing everyone.
How do you feel that the fields of music and acting lend themselves to one another?
Acting or recording is a quiet thing; it is just me and the team creating that special moment.
When I am on stage, there is so much energy exchanged between me and the fans. I love them all, but they are all very different.
Speaking of acting – has there been one role in particular that you have felt has been similar to yourself?
In each character I’ve found a little something in common, here or there.
What I love most about acting though, is that you get to suspend reality and bring a new character to life.
It is an amazing experience. Acting has always been my first love. I always thought that acting would be my career, that or being a horse jockey (LOL).
I am very grateful for the success that I have had with my music, but it has been fun getting back to acting, as well.
Having been in the entertainment business since such a young age – how have you seen the worlds of acting and music change over the years?
Well, they are basically the same in terms of the work and creative process, but technology has evolved a lot. And that has changed what can be done onscreen or in the studio.
It is great to have fun experiencing these changes and working with them.
With your book True You – what do you hope that readers come away with from reading it?
The most important thing to me that I want anyone reading the book, especially the kids, to walk away with is that they are perfect just as they are, and that they are not alone.
If the kids out there can read True You and see that I went through some of the same experiences that they are going through, perhaps, they will know that it will get better.
It is not about being gay, straight, black, white or Latino. It’s not about being too skinny or having curves, it is about being your true you.
I really hope that the kids in the GLBT community hear it when I say that they are perfect, just the way they are.
That is why it was so important for me to participate in the ‘It Gets Better’ campaign. I was teased and picked on when I was a kid. It has been a long road, but I am happy with my life now. It does get better!
What do you think of the term “icon” and its association to yourself and your career?
Thank you. Icon is such a big statement – Elizabeth Taylor, Lena Horne, Dorothy Dandridge – women like that are icons.
I feel like I still have so much more to accomplish in my life. I am happy that people have identified with my work, and am grateful for all the support over the years.
For all things Janet Jackson-related, log onto http://www.janetjackson.com
Dear Bitter Becky,
I need your assistance to a very sticky situation; it has to potential to become even stickier, so a response is needed ASAP!
My life partner “Quinn” and I have been together for about 18 years now. I own a business and support the both of us. He doesn’t do anything at all, since getting fired from his job as a high school biology teacher several years ago (which is a whole separate letter). All he ever does is watches TV, spends his afternoons drinking alone at home, and is always well-sloshed when I get home.
Neither one of us is getting any younger, and while I work hard to keep myself together and fighting the age monster, he has just let himself go. He looks nothing like that hot guy I met at a pool party back in the early ’90s.
I’m just afraid to leave because I own a business; we have our townhouse, and have also invested in the apartment building next door way back when. We are tied together in so many other ways.
I am also frightened of what he might do if I get the courage to leave. And now he’s hired this 20something house boy named “Jake” that I cannot afford to pay for. However, “Jake” is young and sweet, and very good looking, SO good looking, like staring at the middle of the sun HOT. But I try not to think about him like that. I just don’t want to put the kid out, or leave him alone with my aging, drunken lover.
I feel trapped! Help!!!
Thanks for listening,
Trapped
Dear Trapped,
Oh boo frickin’ hoo. Waah, waah, waah…I have two men in my life. Girl, I’d be happy with one…that I didn’t have to pay to come over to my apartment to rub my bunions for a quarter. But, it is the literal price of beauty now, ain’t it? Suck on that, Jessica Simpson. So, you’re situation is one of the sticky variety, eh?
That reminds me…the air conditioning just plumb and went out in my spacious studio rental…guess, I’ll have to dig up another quarter from my couch cushions and have Jean-Paul either hose me off or fan me, either or is fine by me.
But, rummaging through all the discarded Cheetos and Snowball wrappers is just so time consuming. Tick tock, tick tock, whatever. I don’t see why J.P. can’t just dig through those damn cushions himself, since I am the one who pays, quarters don’t grow on trees you know!
Oh yes, back to your petty problem…and you ain’t the only one with houseboy troubles, now are ya?
As I see it, you need to adopt the old adage of “Dump that zero and get yourself a hero,” I think that came from the Bible or something…maybe it was a Will Ferrell movie? That reminds me, I’ve had Talladega Nights for six months from Netflix…can you believe that? Six. Months. It’s not like my phone is ringing off the hook with dates. I don’t even have a phone, as that is a luxury item, if ever I heard of one. Hand to Heaven, or Hell, is more like it for me, I’ve had a hard knock life, harder than that little no pupil-eyed beeyatch Annie – don’t get me started on her.
Ok, oh “Trapped” one, I see the stickiness of the situation at hand.
GROW A PAIR!
Dump the lazy-no-goodnick for Jake, he sounds like a slice of angel food cake (ooh, I could go for a piece right about now), and if things work out between the two of you – maybe we could go on a double date.
I can see it now – you, me, Jake, J.P., all noshing on an intimate supper at Taco Bell. Well that is if you don’t mind the constant odor of bad feet. His, not mine, surprisingly! It probably won’t happen, he don’t want nobody to know he even comes over to my place, things NEVER go my way. Oh, if the plan does pan, remember I ain’t got a phone; I have your address from the letter you sent, so I know how to find you. And, you’d better respond, or I will hunt you down!
Hope this helped you, I know that I feel better, and really, isn’t that the more important thing?
Worst Wishes (why should you have a good life, if I don’t?),
Bitter Becky
P.S. Make sure you get half of whatever “Quinn” (thank goodness that’s a fake name, ’cause it sounds like a cologne or somethin’) is worth in your apartment complex. He’ll be so drunk, he probably won’t even notice that you’re gone! And remember, you have your little business, which I imagine involves dressing up Chihuahuas in little costumes and then photographing them! You sicko!
Bitter Becky (real name withheld for legal reasons) received her counseling degree online, and was previously seen giving her “unique” brand of advice to audience members on “The Maury Povich Show.” Thus, the withholding of her identity, as several studio guests have pooled their resources and taken out a hit on her life. She currently lives alone in her “spacious” studio apartment, with her cat “Mr. Sprinkles,” and is a self-described “giver.” If you have any questions for Bitter Becky to answer, please send them to us.
One of the greatest perks of my job is that I get to chat with people I truly admire, and I get to thank them for making an impact on my pop culture life. A very good case-in-point is Armistead Maupin, who is my favorite author of all-time, such a warm and freindly man, we talked for almost an hour all about Tales of the City, including its new incarnation as a musical.
Read all about it on pages 54-56 at:
My interview with the one and only Kylie Minogue…hear all about her upcoming U.S. concert tour, and what she would never change about it at
http://www.ragemonthly.com/2011/05/04/kylie-minogue-%e2%80%93-the-return-of-the-mighty-aphrodite/
Farley Granger: Days Gone By
By Tim Parks 
Actor Farley Granger is widely recognized for his roles in two Alfred Hitchcock thrillers, Rope and Strangers on a Train.
But, with the recent publication of his memoir, Include Me Out: My Life From Goldwyn to Broadway, Granger has also become known as an out actor.
His memoir chronicles dalliances with both male and female Hollywood types, including actress’ Ava Gardner and Shelley Winters, composer Leonard Bernstein and screenwriter Arthur Laurents (who wrote the screenplay for Rope).
The delightful 82-year-old Granger has a definite aversion to labels of any types when it comes to sexuality; he feels they give ammunition to “those enemies coming at you,” as he explained to The Gay and Lesbian Times during a recent phone interview.
“There always has to be the people to champion the cause, the shock troops, and God love ’em –God love the Stonewall Riots and everything, thank heaven for them,” Granger said about those that fight the good fight. “The time when there is no weight given to one particular label is going to be the ideal time.”
Granger’s Include Me Out: My Life From Goldwyn to Broadway is chocked full of Hollywood lore, and writing the memoir (along with his partner of 50 years, Robert Calhoun), proved to be a walk down memory lane.
His remembrances of Hollywood’s glory days showcase how much the world of Tinsel Town has changed since Granger was discovered as a high school senior by a casting director, and had to hone his craft as a contract player for Goldwyn.
“I don’t think it’s a community anymore the way it was,” Granger stated about the Hollywood of today. “It’s run by corporate conglomerates, each studio had its own kind of familial feeling – there was the Metro crowd and the Fox crowd and the Warner crowd, everyone met everyone else, and now that whole sense of community is gone.”
And that feeling of community is one of Granger’s favorite memories of being a part of Hollywood’s Golden Era.
“The Saturday night open house parties at Gene Kelly’s house,” he cited as his favorite Hollywood remembrance. “Through mutual musician friends, I got introduced to the MGM musical crowd, and they all hung out at Gene Kelly’s house. And on any Saturday night, you’d go over there and it could be Judy Garland and Lena Horne or Johnny Mercer or Betty Garrett, just singing at the piano for the pure joy and release of it; those parties were memorable, I’ll never forget them.”
Include Me Out also details just how much the climate regarding sexuality in those heady days has evolved.
“Well, at that time when I was there, I left just before the advent of Confidential Magazine, which really blew the roof off everything,” Granger recanted. “It started to threaten to expose people and then they (gays in Hollywood) were going to great lengths like arranged marriages, and all of that. There were gay cliques, but I was never part of them, just because I had more fun with the musical crowd.
“There was a bit more freedom, everybody knew what was going on and no one talked about it, and the studios protected their people,” he said. “Then when the gossip became like Confidential Magazine, and funnily it coincided with McCarthyism in the ’50s in this country, things got very strange.”
Throughout film history gay portrayals on film reinforced the stereotype of the sissy as the go-to-gag to elicit laughter from movie going patrons, and these cases of “shock and eww” stereotyping was prevalent until the trend turned toward darker portrayals. The “possibly gay character” being cast as the villain arrived on the movie scene casting a dark shadow on the ways we were being seen by the masses.
The Alfred Hitchcock films, Rope and Strangers on a Train, both contain elements of homosexuality, albeit it was of the “gay as a villain” motif that was prevalent during that era of filmmaking, but there is no denying what is transpiring between the main characters in both of those Hitchcock films. Granger was not concerned that this would lead audiences to draw certain conclusions about his lifestyle.
“I didn’t care,” he responded. “I was just so happy to be working with Hitchcock at that moment in time. Who cared what people thought? It didn’t bother me at all.”
In Rope, a fictionalized account of the 1924 Leopold and Loeb murder case, Granger starred alongside gay actor John Dall and perennial Hitchcock star, Jimmy Stewart, who may not have been so comfortable with the film’s gay undercurrent.
“It was odd working with him on Rope. I loved working with him, he was a true gentleman, but in Rope I don’t think he was happy,” Granger summarized. “He was very remote and kept to himself and was kind of aloof. I don’t think he was comfortable – we never discussed it (the film’s subject matter), but I am sure he was aware of it.”
But, Granger suspects that Hitchcock knew that the chemistry between him and his leading men had a certain “flair” to it and feels that his own sexuality may have added an extra element to his performances.
Particularly in Strangers on a Train, where there is a magnetic attraction between Granger and co-star Robert Walker in this tale of a “criss-cross” murder scheme. The film holds a special place on Granger’s resume (undoubtedly, it’s his most popular film), as well as in his heart.
“It’s my favorite, too. Audiences today love it, it works every time I’ve seen it with an audience right up to a month ago,” he said. “They get the humor and everything, which is amazing, that he (Hitchcock) told such a weird suspense story and got so much humor in it. I think it’s one of his best films and it’s underrated.”
Granger appeared in numerous films, before he began working in the early days of live television. Eventually the luster of the bright lights of Hollywood faded for Granger, who decided to head for the stage lights of Broadway. This move entailed him breaking his contract with Goldwyn, and he essentially had to buy his way out of said binding agreement to work on The Great White Way. It was a move that suited Granger just fine, as he won an Obie award for the play “Tally & Son.”
“The interaction with the live audience, there is nothing like it.” Granger replied of which medium, film or theatre brought him the most satisfaction. “It changes every night, it’s different at every performance, because people bring to the theatre their day or the world, and you have to adapt subtly – it’s a fascinating challenge.”
Now that his personal life is being played out on a different stage, in the pages of his memoir, Granger felt it was cathartic to tell his tale, and that the time was right to do so now.
“Well I was afraid if I waited any longer, I’d either die or forget,” he said with a laugh. “I had been wanting to do it for awhile; I had started it in about 1990, but put it aside. And, it seemed like a few years ago it was time to go back to it.”
I conducted this interview with Farley in 2007. He was a gentleman on a grand scale, and we hit it off when he realized I knew my Hitchcock movies, of which Strangers on a Train, is truly one of the director’s finest. I was saddened by his passing last week, and decided to post my interview with him (thought I already had, honestly), and may he rest in peace.
Flashes of Brilliance: An Interview with Photographer Tim Hailand
By Tim Parks 
Tim Hailand is a well-respected photographer whose works adorns the walls of celebrity abodes, including Elton John’s and Sarah Jessica Parker, to name a few. He has come up with a fascinating One Day in the Life of…book series that focuses on stars like Daniel Radcliffe, Jake Shears, Rufus Wainwright and rugby player Gareth Thomas.
Come on check it out with me, won’t you on pages 40-42 at:
Tim Parks Media Ho 
