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Hollywood: The P**SY Posse

By Tim Parks

Confessions From The Catbird Seat

OK, I’ll admit a gay sin, so sit right back as I confess this little nugget of doubt to you; and please save the judgment for me, k? Deep breath and exhaling the most diabolical case of losing faith ever…I didn’t think that Anne Hathaway could pull off the role of one Selena Kyle AKA Catwoman. I am not worried about things being thrown at me, because we’re “the gays.” Hey, stereotypes kinda do come from somewhere, if not all of it born from ignorance.

Thank God I didn’t reveal this during Comic-Con, as those geeks can throw and nerd slushees don’t come out of your clothes so easily; just ask the gang on Glee and I am all for being sticky and sweet, but that is a case of TMI from TIM – isn’t it always?

Anyhoo, back to our same Bat Time, Same Bat Channel show already in progress….

I always think of our Miss Hathaway…no, not the lesbianonic from The Beverly Hillbillies, although now that I think of it, she was fond of the catnip – I always see Annie (we’re tight) as the hear-me-meow-much-put-upon-assistant to Ms. Streep in The Devil Wears Prada.

Or as Jake Gyllenhaal’s longsuffering wife in Brokeback Mountain – ever notice that her wigs got more elaborate, but she never aged? Ah, the magic of Hollywood. Mind you, that’s not the point of the story.

So, when casting notices went around that Cher was not going to play the feline femme fatale (true story) for the final chapter of  The Dark Knight’s incredible cinematic journey, courtesy of the ever-brilliant Christopher Nolan; I was obviously at a gay loss. Just who the hell was going to don the patent black leather cat suit and matching ears ensemble and let it whip. Who I implore of you?

You know I was hoping I might even get to try out for this most coveted of parts, when I received news that ole Princess Diaries beat me to the punch. It’s probably a good thing, as I was just about to call Joan Rivers to guest star on The Fashion Police to go all Sean Young, circa the ’90 s and her big bag of unraveled yarn for wanting to be Hello Kitty when Tim Burton said, “No go, crazy pants!”

Catwoman’s Comic Book Herstory

The reason for all of the hullabaloo regarding said casting, you may ask?

I have an affinity for the feline foe that first appeared in DC Comics Batman#1 in the Spring of 1940, when she was simply known as The Cat; it is widely believed that she had a two-fold inspiration genesis, as Bob Kane reportedly based her on Harlow, Jean – picture of a beauty queen, Vogue!

The second source for Selena Kyle’s felonious feline altar ego is said to be that of Kane’s cousin Ruth Steel, which in and of itself screams comic book villainess, either that or a porn actress, who starred in the movie Clambake – meouch, keep the claws in, Parks.

Of note, Catwoman’s first appearance had her nude in the comics, very risqué for that time in history. What’s that you say? She appeared sans a super villain costume and in regular folks garb…oh, there goes my chick wood.

Ten years later, her true identity was revealed as, wait for it, Selena Kyle and thanks to those already paying attention, geez.

In 1977, the character was, ahem, unmasked as the woman Golden Age Batman ultimately married in a “Secret Origin” as a new heroine called The Huntress (Secret Origins of Superheroes #17). Girl, that’s so scandalous, too bad they didn’t go on Maury, as it wasn’t around then.

But how they, um, came together was featured in the April 1983 tale “The Autobiography of Bruce Wayne” (Brave and the Bold #197) while the wedding itself was shown in 1981’s Superman Family #211.  Aww, we are family, I’ve got all my Super Friends and me…holla.

There was more kerfuffle, when Batman’s adversary was all “Pre-Crisis” upon dating Bruce Wayne in February 1979 (Batman#308), which elevated her to a regular character in the Batman titles for close to a year in her un-costumed persona; where she looked like a cross between Idina Menzel with a heaping dash of Bea Arthur thrown in. Hawt, sign me up!

Catwoman also went for a solo run as a backup in the Batman comic. This occurred during the summer of 1993, in which artist Jim Balent’s hot template was selected the “Sexiest Character in Comics,” one shutters to think what her competition was at the time – maybe Amy Fisher: Teen Avenger?

 

To read the entire column, log onto: ragemonthly.com

About timparksmediaho

I am a self professed Media Ho, which is the nicer version of being a Media Whore. My mother actually inspired me to come up with the term

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