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Hollywood: The Top 8 Celebrity Train Wrecks of 2008.

Hollywood: The Top 8 Celebrity Train Wrecks of 2008.

By Tim Parks 

C’mon admit it…there’s a perverse fascination surrounding train wrecks of the celebrity variety.

While some of the objects left on the tracks that sadly derail these stars often involve discarded drug paraphernalia, emotional baggage and unscheduled whistle stops to rehab; there is something admittedly interesting about these falls from grace of those who seem to have it all.

2008 wasn’t the wild train ride it has been in years past, with nary a female celeb flashing her hoo-ha for the paparazzi, but there were stand out train wreck moments.

And some people who would usually top the list were conspicuously absent this year, such as Paris and Lindsay. Let’s take a looksie at who made the cut, shall we?  

#8 Britney Spears

What a difference a year makes! Britney may be starting out 2009 back on top, but at this time last year, she was at the psych ward at Cedars Sinai on a 5150 hold – that’s a technical term regarding being cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs, AKA being a danger to herself or others.

Funny, her disastrous VMA performance was in September of ’07 – seems she would have been a bigger threat then.

Anyhoo, then Brit Brit found herself checking into UCLA Medical Center by month’s end, apparently Cedars Sinai was sooo beginning-of-the-month-passé.

Her manager, Sam Lufti, was fired amidst allegations of drugging the pop princess (girl, those weren’t Flintstones chewable vitamins!), replaced by former manager, Larry Rudolph, the man who helped launch her career. Her father, Jamie Spears, was granted conservertorship of her business affairs.

I guess Chris Crocker was right – we should have left Britney alone! Go figure!   

#7 Sharon Stone

While Sharon Stone’s career is becoming more like wishful thinking with each passing moment (her last hit flick was 13 years ago), she did manage to get some press this year. But, that was not a good thing!

When asked by the press about the devastating earthquake in China last May, Stone chalked it up to karma for the Chinese treatment of the Tibetans, while name dropping her friendship with the Dalai Lama. I bet a certain Lama is screening her phone calls, and I still wonder why anyone would talk to her, let alone in a red carpet setting.

Then, she accused Diddy of spending his money on crack at an amfAR AIDS benefit. Glass houses, Ms. Stone, glass houses! At least he’s not trying to Botox his child’s feet to control foot odor. Maybe she should try that on her own feet, as Stone definitely suffers from foot-in-mouth disease. 

#6 David Duchovny

The “Californication” star’s world took on a life-imitating-art aspect as he professed to researching his sex addict role off the set with online porn, which led to he and wife Tea Leoni separating for a spell. Is that a possible Emmy I smell, or just a stockpile of discarded tissues in Duchovny’s trash can?

#5 Naomi Campbell

Known for notoriously throwing cell phones, Campbell only threw a fit at London’s Heathrow Airport over lost luggage (guess her cell phone was in there, otherwise, she would have reached out and hit someone with it). She was arrested for allegedly assaulting a police officer during the incident.

Three words apply here: Anger. Management. Classes.

#4 Kanye West

The oh-so-humble Kanye was also arrested at an airport. No, there wasn’t foot tapping in a bathroom stall involved, rather West put the smack down on two paparazzi at LAX. Then, he was arrested in England for…getting into an altercation with a (it’s on the tip of my tongue) paparazzi. Way to branch out there, Kanye! 

#3 George Michael

Another bathroom arrest for George Michael? Really, that’s so 1998, and if you want us to forget about that particular incident, then stop getting arrested in bathrooms! I guess the upswing is it was only for Class A and C drugs – he was thought to be holding crack, which is ironic given the surroundings of his arrest.   

#2 Tara Reid

While she’s still HUGE in Dubai, Reid’s career in the States has become

as stalled as the economy. It’s so bad that Reid had an online petition sent to the makers of the Nightmare on Elm Street remake, essentially begging for a part in the film! Maybe they’ll throw her a bone and cast her botched tummy tuck as one of Freddy’s victims. Remember Tara, beggars can’t be choosers! 

#1 Amy Winehouse  

Here’s hoping that the five Grammy awards Winehouse won in February don’t get ground down to actual grams for the beleaguered singer – otherwise her career achievements may go right up her nose!

As it stands, her career could vanish in a puff of crack pipe smoke.

If she’s only an occasional user (if the occasion is the day ending with y), then what’s up with the early signs of emphysema, the fisticuffs (including one with her own bodyguard), going into rehab, the many hospital stays, and cutting off her signature beehive hairdo this year?     

Hopefully, she can literally get her act together for 2009.

This article was first published in Janury 2009.  

Cut.Print.That’s A Wrap!

While it’s easy enough to take potshots at these celebs, we still have to remember we all share the same human frailties. Hey! I almost believed that for a minute. Until next time, that’s all of the news that’s fit to print!

About timparksmediaho

I am a self professed Media Ho, which is the nicer version of being a Media Whore. My mother actually inspired me to come up with the term

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